Convicted Artist Magazine

Feb 21st
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kimbo_slice_ufcOk, this news came to me last week... that former street-fighting stand-out, and MMA flop Kimbo Slice (aka Kevin Ferguson) has signed with a major boxing promoter (aka Gary Shaw).  So, now he will begin his career as a boxer.  This will happen in his mid/late 30's, of course, which doesn't make him that much older than most contenders.  If this is merely a publicity stunt, we all know what is going to happen. 

Kimbo will be hand-fed a bunch of hapless clubfighters to build his record up before being handed a worthy foe in a high profile fight.  He will then be brutally KO'd in the high profile fight, but have made enough "believers" while knocking over stiffs that the fight makes money.  There are always enough uneducated fans to dupe out there.  Remember New York Jet turned boxer Mark Gastineau?  However, on the off-chance that they are serious about making Kimbo Slice into a boxer than can be ranked, I'd like to offer two basic recommendations on the best way to make that happen.
First off, no weight-training.  He had no stamina for MMA matches.  How on earth is he going to handle a potential 8 or 10 or 12 round match?  Concentrate on cardio-training, in every way possible.  Swimming, biking, running, bag drills.  Everything that can be done to improve his stamina.  It won't be easy at his age and great bulk to make him a long-distance athlete.  However, making him into someone who doesn't collapse after 2 minutes should be doable.

Secondly, you only have 10-15 fights and two years to make a serious move before he gets too old, and everyone forgets about him.  To take advantage of his name recongition, he has to face a new, realistic challenge each fight.  Give him that hapless clubfighter the first time out, then a veteran clubfighter, then a southpaw, then a guy with a lot fo fights but mostly losses.  Then a fighter who is durable.  Next, give him a puncher, then a quick fighter.  Have him learn to deal with new things each time out, so that his skills and confidence grow.  Maybe both Klitschkos will have retired by then, and he can catch one of the leftover beltholders with a lucky punch.  That is likely the best case scenario if you are a Kimbo Slice fan.

However, I am by nature a prediction man, and also a pessimist.  I see this going in a mix of the above strategies.  They will attempt to move him slow, then get frustrated at the lack of fan interest.  Next, being wary of losing television interest, they will put him in too big, too soon, and he will get KO'd in an undercard match.  He will probably notch a win or two after that, before being KO'd again by someone of even lesser skill.  After the second failure, he will probably say goodbye.  Ol' Mr. Ferguson will likely be paid more than any other guy who fails at the 6 or 8 round levels, so good for him.  The only shame is on the people who will be suckered into thinking this is real.

Chris Strait

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Midknight  - hand fed |
I believe even being "hand fed a bunch of hapless club fighters" would end his career before it started. WWF is where he's headed.
Jay  - Kimbo in Boxing - Yeah Right! |
Kimbo is a quiter and doesn't have the disapline, focus and endurance to make a decent boxer. I recommend he sign up for WWF wrestling.
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